Friday, January 29, 2010

my other dream

terhenyak oleh salah satu postnya mba Ups alis Upi.
woww! we have a same dream, and too bad I've just realized it by her..
she mentioned that he used to make her own magz when she was a child, and so did I !
I can remember it clearly..
I cropped my Kawanku Magz (I subscribed it at the moment), i cropped all of the pictures there, then I put them down into a blank paper then I wrote down on it. I made it precisely like a real magz unless the packaging ya, i just "jepret" it. and I could remember how was my writing at the moment.. i used to words such as "buruan kebet/ gebet, jangan sampe keabisan.. and so on.. and the corrs pic was the cover of the magz. nyahaha..
I really had plenty of Kawanku Magz, why i subscribed it instead of Gadis? it's because kawanku has a great article especially the personality part or the tips.
and I learnt so much from those articles..

when i was in my first grade of junior high school, i was choosen by my Indonesia languge teacher to be a writer of my school's magz called "Eksis" (haha!). i was a writer of a quiz page or personality tips article..
and i got my inspiration of writing an article was from Kawanku, and nobody realized that i was a bit did plagiarism. hahaha.. oops!

and now.. ive got my own blog.. my writing.. and you guys may read mine. wohoo ! such an honour..
just realized it, that this has been such a journey for me.. a journey of my writing..
i know that im way too far from perfect in writing.. but at least writing is such a pleasure for me..
i know its my medicine, my pleasure, my trash can
and so on..

"a good writer is a good reader"

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

the effect of istighfar

have you ever felt the effect of saying (repeating) istighfar?
I have !

if we keep repeating istighfar, so Allah would give some unexpected sustenance.

I've experienced it!

Someday I was istighfar-ing when im on way back home, and as I arrived home I found a 50.000 rupiahs inside my pocket bag ! WOW !
I couldnt remember where that money came from. either i took it myself on ATM or from my papa then i put it folded. ngahaha.. alhamdulillah pokoknya!

and the other experience is just happenned lately..
i had been not isitghfaring at that moment.. till one day I did it, ( I usually doing istighfar on my way to somewhere).. and again as I arrived home, I got a call from my grandma, she told me that I left an envelope of "gala gampil" (bagi2 amplop pas lebaran) with 50.000 rupiahs in it. WOWW!
I left it on Ied day, i put it on my grandma's cupborard. I perhaps left it because there were so many envelops i got ! but i think it's a quite long time ago. since september till january !

hahah. alhamdulillah !
I've proven it
I've experienced it
that Allah's certainty does EXIST!

bye all :)

Saturday, January 23, 2010

excited !

got a nice offer from my brodkes friend, and I straight to the point "yess! I doo"
Oooh how i love to be on cam! haha
kinda banci tampil sih guee..
i used to be a host on my brodkes assignment. and i enjoy it!
and my old friend offered me to be a host of a feature program on TVRI..
and the shooting will be held by tomorrow!
W O W..
though im not gonna be paid. its ok!
i mean, i love to be a host..
i love broadcast world..
I'd like to have a new experience..
and even its my old friend's project and so I'll be "tandem" with my another old friend..
nice :)

I'm so excited..
gotta to wake up early in the morning guys..

wish me luck !
talk to you later..


a text from Eyang

in the middle of nite..
got a text from "eyangku" means my grandmother..

1. Saya adalah tempat paling gelap maka terangilah saya dengan tahajjud..
2.Saya adalah tempat yang paling sempit maka luaskanlah saya dengan bersilaturahim
3.Saya adalah tempat yang paling sepi maka ramaikanlah saya dengan memperbanyak membaca Al-Quran
4.Saya adalah tempatnya binatang-binatang yang menjijikkan maka racunilah mereka dengan amal sedekah
5.Saya adalah tempat Munkar dan Nakir bertanya maka persiapkanlah jawabanmu dengan perbanyak mengucapkan kalimat "Lailahailalloh"

wow it's so enlightening
(since I've just sent an email in terms of religion, to faz)
shit, hate to admit that i feel lost, far from Allah..
I rarely to do some things to Allah..lately

Friday, January 22, 2010


have you ever felt like hate your ownself??
I am now

Thursday, January 21, 2010

a (late) birthday surprise :)

whats up??
Just got home from mingling with my besties, my high school friends (strawbz) to be exact :)
and one thing make it very special is the attendance of my so long time no see friends though we're get college in the same town >> Lidia! the one whom always busy with her campus, organizations thingy and also her religion and family thingy :) glad to know that she's still the same. nothing's change..
so here are the girls.. (sorted from who came earlier)
dinaa.. dita. putri. gue. moi. lidia. gyanda..

after sency-ing at foord court.. (oh god just realized that i didnt enter the stores there at all..) we went straight to belezza to do karaoke at NAV.. :)

and as we entered the karaoke room.. few minutes than..
there was a small cake with a small candle on top of it..
and they played birthday songs on the playlist..
woww.. it felt like i was in a small birthday party.. with the music as the backsound..
hahahah.. so nice :)
thank youuu... it worked lohh girlsss ;)
i didnt realized it when did they plan it.. haha..
but honestly i had an expectation to be surprised by them as I met them at sency,
but as we left sency i forgot the expectation.. heheh..

bottom : dita
gyanda whom took this pic

got another pics on moi's BB..
thanks my dears.. really had a great day with you all..

love youu :)

make some changes, ra!

since I've been criticized by my old & new friends.. i think i should realy have to change my bad attitude.. bad thoughts..
hmm FYI, this is my first time being criticized or complained by my friends (besides my bebi did)..
wow I feel shocked, and feels resist but i know those thing are damn true !
huaa !
considering that im the one who used to criticize or complain my close friends ( i mean, with good intentions yah) and now im at that position.. ohh feels sucks.. knowing that something wrong with urself which may affect others surrounds you..
ahh what am i talking bout sihh.. haha sorry for my bad english yaa..

oke. here the points are:
- stop being "menyebalkan" person ra..
- stop forcing others towards your wants ra..
- stop being arbitary person *semena-mena
- be more aware towards others' feelings/opinion (about urself ra)
- be a delightful person
- say hello to your non peer group friends, please..
- dont be too picky..
- dont underestimate people whom u dont know well..
- stop thinking that others should get adapt with you yaa..

okee, i know it's very very hard for you raa.. but u should do it yaa!
its for ur own sake..
cheer up!

thanks to sarah and dinda whom made me recognize bout all my faults..
and alsoo bebi faz :)

thanks God

cooking kara :)

how are youu guys.. ??
today i just spent time at home..
i woke up at 2pm ! whoaa.. woke up by eyang's call.. that told me should taking care of my step mom, bcause she's sick and my papa went out of town..
so I made her scrambled egg with bread and and an boilled egg.. :)
and as I watched Julie & Julia dvd.. wow i really want to cook.. i want to be able to cook anything.. but i feel like i would never cook such as chicken thingy, because its so euuhhh! maybe i could make some cake, or anyhting else. hehe..
and right after watched that movie, i went to kitchen and started to peel up the garlics and onions..
hmm i started to make my own fried rice.. mixed with scrambled egg.. and i added saori sauce randomly..
ohh i remember my grandma's recipe. she said just put in chicken broth into it..
and.. voilaa !
it works.. i gave it to my step mom to try it.. and she said "enakkk!"
yess! I agree.. it was quite delicious ! wohoo..
hope I wont so just stop or quit due to this succeed.. knowing that im kinda -angot-angot-tai-ayam- person ! haha..
lovely day.. hmm now im thinking to cook or make another recipe by tomorrow..

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

whats wrong with me ??

whats wrong with me today?
I argued with two people in one day!
one with one of my best friend and the other was with my step mom..
i dont know why, is it because of my period? or it's just my uncontrolled emotion..
i dont know why...
i feel like such a sucks person who cant make a good relation and interaction with others..
i feel like i wanna escape from all of this sheet!!
i wanna run far far away from all f these shittyness..
i know, the problem is on me.. me, myself and I!
but i have no idea to fix my ownself..

my self is such a damn huge enemy for my ownself..
its very hard to beat ur ownself, ur own ego..
ive got such a big egoo..
which very hard to beat..
goshh... God please help me..
i know You are the one who created me..
so please give me strength to face this reality..
give me more patience.. dont let me run away from You..

latest news: i finally got reconciliation with one of my bestiest..
glad to know that..
soo i gotta change my bad attitude from now on?
but how?
i dont know... just wait and see..

Monday, January 18, 2010

Thank God You've sent him to me :)

you know what?
I got climax in the end of my birthday.. a sad climax to be exact..
since faz has read my previous post, then he felt regret due to not giving me a bday present or bday surprise..
but its OK, since i feel like "ok its just like another ordinary day ra, dont make it too special"
then he did apologize to me for being careless.. but it's ok..
i was trying to stay calm and pretending everyting is ok..
but then, there's a moment that made him cranky to me and he hung up the phone. and suddenly the video call we had, off. i thought he did it.
then suddenly i cried, i was sobbing.. a loud sobbing..
it was just like i cant control my voice..
the emotion was just suddenly explode, blow up! and it reached it's climax!
i thought that oh god.. im sobbing but faz is not here with me, he doesnt know what im doing now..
(he used to accompany me in evry condition, especially in my lowest point)
and suddenly there was a call in skype from faz, I answered him but i couldnt stop my tears, my sobs..
i kept crying, sobbing while the video call has running.. but i dont wanna stare the laptop screen in order to hide my crying face..
and my esia phone was ringing.. i answered while kept sobbing.. then there was a voice sounded worry and panic.. "bebi kenapaa? yaampuun.. bebihh.. bebih kamu kenapa nangiss? kenapa beb? "
i answered "huhu.. gatauu.. aku gatau kenapa aku nangiis.."
the conversation goes.. till he could handle me, could calm me and I felt better..

I've always been like that.. i couldnt control my feelings my emotions till I do cry.. i have to release all of my emotions by crying.. and i''ve always felt better after that.. i used to do that thing alone but since i have faz as my boyfie, he has always knew what im feeling and he has always accompanied me whenever I cry..  whenever Im feeling down, feeling upset, feeling disappointed, feeling happy.. and so on..

ohh God is very very kind to me, very nice to me.. God keep sending him to accompany me in every condition.. his voice was sooo calming.. his concerns and his panic shows a big real deep love.. i feel so lucky to be loved by him. i know he's loving me so much. and so do I.
i cant imagine how my life would be without him. God please make us togother forever as a hubby and wify. amiin (cailahhh) hahaa..

alhamdulillah. insyaAllah. amiin

love love love

Saturday, January 16, 2010

my (sepi) 22nd bday and the bday review

I went home to jkt from Bandung in friday final exam has done on that day..
jam setengah 12 nunggu dijemput bokap di emperan jalan.. citi trans SCBD.
sambil smsan sama bebi..
sebelum jam 12 akhirnya dijemput bokap dan tante nina.. dan pergantian ulangtahun gw pun gw lalui di mobil.. dan diucapin selamat oleh tante nina dan papa.. dan sms pun mulai berdatangan.. telfon juga..
terus mulai dehh bermunculan ekspektasi-ekspektasi yang diinginkan sang birthday lady..
ternyataa semuanya biasa sajaaa.. hahah.
kirain si bebi mo ngapain, nanya2in kapan sampe rumah..
taunyaa cuma webcam dan dia tidur.. zzz...
yaudah gw tidur juga dehh..

Dibangunin tante nina, karna dia sama bokap mo ke komdak, trs dibilangin kalo ada kado dari tante srie (faz's mom). tapi gue masih merem2 aja tidur.. sambil ngebayangin dapet kado apa.. hehe..
pas bangun-bangun.. ehh ada bingkisan gede di meja blajar kamarr gue!
wihh senang dehh.. gini ya rasanya bangun2 ada kado di kamar..
lalu kubuka.. wahh tas! tas berwarna hitam.. baguus cuma bukan tipe gue aja kali yah, hehe..
malah yang berkesan tuh kartu ucapannya..
" Today is your 22nd birthday//
step by step, day by day you will become a mature girl.. more confident.. more responsible, giving, loving & caring to the family & others
we allo love you kara.. "

trus ada gambar2 mukanya tante srie, om Babud, kakben, deycil, and faz.. smuanya ceritanya ngasih ucapan, kecuali deycil yg masih tidur n faz yang jauh..

terus tapinyaa bete dirumah moloo.. mana siangnya gw sendirii.. cuma ol doang. bonyok blm pulang, haqa entah dimana.. baru pada ngumpul pas malem.. ada kue tart tapi masih blom dipotong..
kerjaan gw dari pagi sampe malem cuma OL!
balesin fb orang2, balesin twitter orang2..
ihh goblok banget ya guee.. pasti orang nyangkanya gue tuh ultah kemana gtuu.. dinner sama klrg ato apa gtuu..
huaa sepi dehh ga ada surprise dari anak2, berasa banget sepii..
terus gue miki.. "ih kasian juga ya anak2 kalo ga disurprisin sama anak2" pasti sepii.. tp gw mikir, tp seengganya mereka disurprisin pacaarnyaa. huaa...
kaya cocom, dia blg dia disurprisin dito tiba2 di kantornya.. kalo pudi pasti didatengin waja tengah malem.. kalo bundo walopun ga disurprisin anak2 mankom tp dia dapet kado bunga dari cowonya, dpt video..
hmm... BM ya gue? ga bersyukur ya??
yaudalah yaa it's just my random thoughts..
masing2 kan boleh punya keinginan..
ditambah lagii pada nanya.. "dapet apa dari faz?"
jawabnya jadi panjang deh "ga dikasih apa2.. kan udah dikasih jaket kmrn"
daripada gw jawab ga dikasih apa2, dan gw terlihat sedih, dan faz terlihat cuek bebek. haha!

trus kalo emang ga ada temen2 dan pacar.. seengganya ada family dinner. bapak gw sih udah ngajak.. tp adek gw mo pergi, jadinya besok ajaa...
gila nihh gilaaaaaaaaaaa...
malem mingguuu plus ultahh cuma dirumahh..
male minggu dirumah mulu aja gw bisa gilaa.. gimana inihh! HHHH!
trus bete liat status twitter org2 yang malmingan..
knp gw yang ultah sedih, ga ngapa2in.. hmm..

truss guee jadi flashback ultah2 gue seblumnya gimana yaa..
it was quite fun, walopun ada yang gw inget, gw bete ga ngapa2in plus ga ada pacar! haha lebih nista lagi sedihnyaa..

was my 17th birthday. and my last bday celebration with mom. i celebrated it with my big fam and my friends.
my mom was a good EO birthday celebration at this event. the dress code was orange loh! ihiiy.. and my mom was busy to prepare the party and i was just lying on my bed. she shouted "raa bantuin dongg! ini kan acara kamuu! kalo ntar kamu nikah trus kamu yang sante2, trs org laen yg sibuk sih gpp.."
and one of segmen of the event was.. a testimonial about kara. my mom made some orang cards with "kara itu.. " on it.. jadi undangan yang dateng, harus nulis testimoni ttg kara.. dan itu masih gw simpen sampe skrg :)
oiya tp waktu itu yang gw undang cuma temen2 ngaji.. temen2 sekolah engga, hehehe
i think that was my last birthday celebration ever :)

was a bday blast from Superstar friends at salemba (bimbel)
gue ga sadar kalo wkt itu pada ngerencain surprise. heheh..

was a bday blast from my broadcast friends in my first year in BC
and suprisenya agak-agak gagal deh kayanyaa.. hahah! lagian, org lagi di food court trs gw udah pgn solat ashar nih.. eh tiba2 smua pada ilang2an.. pada ke toilet smuaa.. lahh yaudah gw jg mo cabut solat.. ehh pas gw jalan.. lagi pada ngerubungin kue n lagi sibuk nyalain lilin, gw udah mesem2 tuh berharap ada yg liat gw lagi liat. eh kagak! pada sibuk! eh yaudah gw melenggang aja sok2 gtau..
ehh taunyaa jengkoy nelpon n bilang pada mau balik. yaudah deh gw balik ke tempat td sambil mikir hayo gw harus akting yang bagus sok2 kaget! hahah
tp bodohnya pas gw udah mulai mendekat ke meja itu, si etha terlihat lg ngintip dr balik bilik ituu (yg coklat) trs tiba2 duduk lg. hahaha ktauan bgt sih! yaudah deh sok2 akting.. tp emg baik bangeet.. pantesan desire sama viona bisik2 hihi..
okeh lalu gw cabut pulang, tdnya ngajak jengkoy kerumah. eh dia udah seneng, tp gw blg ga jadi deh krn gw mo ngajii.. yaudah deh dia gw turunin di ojek..
pas sampe rumah..
eh ada masdito lg ngbrol2 sama tnina, langsung lah gw masuk kamar.. daan..
gila shock banget! aslii.. untung gw blm buka krudung! haha..dan tiba2 jengkoy dtg.. haha dia buru2 naek ojek nysuul..
ada ray (mantan pd saat itu dan skrg) and kiki (temennya) and anak strawbs n Superstar laennyaa.. huaa gilaa.. yang ini mah berhasil bangeet. dikala gw kira udah cukup dengan surprise yg tadi..


nahh yang ini kayanya menyedihkan nihh.. sampe gw foto2 sendirii.. hihi .
ini merana bgt, udah ga disurprisin, ga punya pacar! haha

was my 21th birthday! and ada yang datang jam 1 malam! haha tp ga ada makanan sama sekaliii!
 tp sneg bangett.. dan seharian kayanya gw dirumah dehh.. trus malemnya ngajiii..
tapii the bday blast hasnt over yet.. tgl 17  jan paginyaa..


it was from strawbs! thanks dears.. masih kebagian nasi kuning dikit2 gpp lah yaa dan tiramisunyaa :)

dan siangnya lagiii
ada yg dataang

rommykuuu.. yang dateng bawa kado plus kado2 dari faz :)
hmm senangnya ultah dua hari :D

today? sebentar lagi 16 januari mo berakhir. sedihh.. tapi sediih karena ga sama temen2 dan pacar.. tp disyukuri aja walopun kecewa, bete, sedih, :(

ini taun kelima ga ada mamah, taun ke dua sama faz, taun pertama di mankom, bertaun2 sama temen2 tersayang..

thanks all :)

Thursday, January 14, 2010


hai folks!
been busy with my final exam thingy for this week.. been busy with campus' stuff..
and today im kinda soo exhausted. though had a nice cooperation with my radio group of doing the (full of laughs) assignment..
im so tired now.. i dont like being pushed, being complained, being claimed.. lalala..
yeah call me stubborn, selfish, rebellious, or whatsoever..
i dont need someone to understand me if they can't..
so please..
stop it!
I dont disturb you in this shitty situation, so could you just be quiet instead of complaining..

Saturday, January 9, 2010

lady in red

ok my previous post was my very emotional side. I rarely to blow up my emotion and my angerness. then I did it just to show up or throw up what has been bugging me lately.. hmm and thank God you've sent me faz ya Allah. he always make calm, feel better, feel relief with his those wise words, those lift-up sentences, those are kinda booster for me. though i still dont know whats the best solution for me forward but at least I feel relief, to know that someone who always take care of me. maybe he hasn't got lots of patience, but he IS the one who has a very big understanding towards me :) I've always made him cranky to me with my oddity but he always understand me though he was cursing at first. I'm sorry bebi.. huhu i always bug you whenever im whining for your attention. ohh call me a baby! yess im your baby, beb! hehe..
It always feels good after being calmed by him..

btw I havent show u up my new IT stuff of 2010 yah?
hihi its faz's best buy and best present to me.. he has a good taste ! yihhaaa...

look! it's a good leather

ohh how gorgeous I am ! hihi.

huooo.. and thank God, as I arrived in Bandung.. the weather has been sooooooooooooooo match up with my new leather jacket! ihiiiy.. haha.. rain drops and the cold weather. perfecto! and as I mingled with my campus friends they were wondering my jacket. some says it is so damn cool, some says they really wanna have it! and yeahh the power of (my) twitter, they shouted "ohh ini ya the IT's stuff ?? Keren! " hihi. and again based on my tweet, they said "ih kara, doa lo kesampean yaa.. jd bisa pake jaket terus" hehe. I obviously happy to have it and especially it is from my bebi :)

and this is my new make-up style in 2010..

yess! a red-orange lispstick on my lips! does it look good on me? yeahh I think soo! yeah call me have-so-much-confidence-! :p

why its stuff become my new make up style? because i was looking for lisptick kind of this in PAC, and there;s no the lipstick with this color, there's a pencil lipstick with this color instead. which iss.. the price is more expensive than the lipstik price! huhh, and i dont know why i choose to bought it.. and i feel so loss if I wear this lipstick pencil rarely, i mean when I hang out. then I decided to wear it everyday, or even to go to campus! hihi.

Ok ! I think its enough to share these unnecessary things except the fazzgoy's thingy :p

Friday, January 8, 2010

hhhhhhhhhhh !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

im crying while writing this post..
I feel so tired, feel so exhausted..
capekkk... gw capekk dipojokkan..
semua orang nuntut gueee... guee yang dituntut harus ini harus ituu.. harus berbuat ini itu..
iya gw tau gw ga ada usahanya.. tp kan gue punya alesann kenapa gw kaya ginii..
ya Allah..
kayanya ga ada orang yang ngertiin gw di dunia ini selain Allah dan diri gw sendiri..
tenggorokan gw sakit.. nahan nangiss.. gw lagi sendiri.. tapi.. kalo gw lepasin bakal sesunggukan, meraung2.. sobbing..
kenapa sihh.. kenapaa.. ya Allah..
maless.. kalo emang gw belom siap, ya tunjukkin ya Allah..
aku ga ngerti apa yg harus aku lakuin..
tunjukkin jalan yang terbaikk.. buat semuanyaa...

kenapa susah banget ngelawan diri sendirii... masalah ada di diri guee.. gue tau ituu.. kalo emang semua orang nganggep gw belom siap, belom pantes.. then what should i do? gw bukan tipikal orang yang mau nunjukkin kalo gw bisa ato gmn.. gw malah mikir, oh yaudah.. terserah deh biar seneng deh lo semuaa...
puass kan looo semuaaa??
anjrit lagi rendah diri bangett...
gue tau apa yg dipikiran orang-orang.. ah kara nihh gini.. gituu.. ga ada usahanyaa.. harusnya kara gini.. gini gituu...
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! wanna cursing !!

ah tai nih gw salah muluu...
dia yang gw kira paling super ngertiin gw juga, dia ga bisa ky gtu terus, dia jg manusia, ada batesnya...
trus gw skrg punya sapa? trs skrg gw nyender ama sapa? kalo ga sama diri gue dan Allah.
temen2 jg bisa apa sih.. ga ada yang ngertiin gue. gw juga ga butuh tatapan kasian dari mereka..
orangtua?? ahh bisanya ngejudge. bukannya ngertiin.. taeee gw kangen mamaa........
mesti deh kaya gini... kalo lg ada masalah ujung2nya kangen mamaa....
ahhh yaampuunnn... innalillahiwainnailahirojiun..

ihh egois banget sih bilangnya belom siappp... itu menunjukkan sikap apa sih? egois? ga mau ditinggal? apa?? bukannya bersyukur kekk.. cepat ato lambat juga gw harus melalui fase itu.. dan dia juga..
emang dasar manusia yaa.. kecepetan dikit, ngeluhh.. "ntar aja.. bla bla.. cuihh"  kelamaan, ngeluhh.. kelimpungann.. "aduhh kapan nihh? ayo dong udah siap nih"
gw kurang apa sihhh jadi anakk?? ga pernah bandel.. hidup gw lurus2 ajaa.. kenapa gini doang susah banget ngabulinnya.. punya anak yg lurus2 di keep.. punya anak yang rebel di judge! ga open-minded!!!!
buat yang disana.. udah ya stopppp ngepush2 gw dan keluarga guee.. sucks! lo gatau apa yang keluarga gw rasainn... kita bedaa.. kalian sih hidup fine2 aja, enak2 aja.. jangan mau enaknya sendirii... ga semua bisa tercapai dengan mudah nya dan lancar !!!!!
hidup !

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

my past time chairmate, Nadya

hello folks !
I've made an appointment with my past chairmate, nadya, to watch a movie at pim today. but.. i was sleep at subuh time.. and.. taraaaaaaa... i woke up at 2 o'clock. and first thing first that i did is check my phone if there's some missed calls or text from nadya.. but there wasnt any notification from her. and I turned my laptop on in order to check my twitter account. but I was dying for a pee, then I straight to bathroom but there was a call from bebi..
"bebi.. udah bangun blom"
"baru aja.."
"dicariin tuh.."
"sama siapa?"
"itu nadyarvie.. ktnya jadi gaa.."
"he eh yaudah aku mo mandi"

less than 15 minutes I'm done took a shower.. then I went to see my lappy, my twitter.. there were two tweets from nadya.. she told me that she had phoned me for many times at about 11 o clock, and the next tweet was on half past twelve. woww ! then I buzz her. gosh she was at PIM. alone. poor her. huhu im so sorry nad !
and blame on my phone. there was no notification. grrr ! I take it as a sign to change my cell phone :p

and afterall, we finally met in somewhere street in order to go to Puri mall.
we started our conversation in, we've spent more than two hours there. with green tea and ice choco freeze as our beverages.
I told her the karafaz's storied.. and she told me her internship experience in Shell. *wow thats so cool nad! I've never been internship. huhu. i envy you..

overall, she's still the same.. the way she tell the stories.. she always talk bout her family, herself, her thoughts.. in details. but there's a side which she has changed, she's not that kinda fairy person any longer.
we each told something happened about us..

we almost spent more than 2 hours in then we took mahgrib pray. as we done maghrib, nadya was whining of starving. ok then we had hokben as our dinner, we choosen the couple paket. though the portion looks slight but then we cant cleaned up it. i was soo damn full !
while we were having our dinner, nadya kept telling me her stories, her thoughts, her family and anything. and me still enjoying her fussyness
I know that she and her family are very nice person, I used to spend my time in her past home in my first grade of senior high school, till my mom and dad picked me up home. huaa miss those moments !
anyway, I found her she has changed from a spoiled person into an independent person, from a -ga-enakan-person into a bit a -bodo-amatan- person. good to know that nad :)

I'll pray the best for youu.. hope u'll be succeed in terms of romance, self development, self esteem, self confidence, thesis, and so on :)

kelakuan dia jaman dulu. emang tergila-gila banget sama gue ! haha :p

nb : love you nadd *tuhh pesenan lo, hahaha.. and love my bebi too *tetep lohh ! hihi.

Monday, January 4, 2010

Introverted or Extroverted type ?

hai folks ! kinda shocked knowing that my site counter shows "1,757 visitors" while on friday it was 1,698. wow, thank you guys.. such a great honour for me to know that u guys keep visiting me.. hmm now i confuse what am I going to write down. its about to 4 am ! actually im waiting for the subuh time instead of focus to write down something. hehe..

hmm.. today.. another mingling time with my girls.. there were gyanda, putri, dira, moi, dita, and erik. i was too excited to meet them ! I'm missing the way gyanda tells some stories or even just give a comment.. its so her. she has her own style in telling stories :)
I'm missing pudii with all of her quirkyness, her kindness, her sillyness. hihi..
I'm missing moi's characterists, yes she's just so her either cuteness or sillyness :p
I'm missing the way dita ceplas ceplos, joking like srimulat (what the??), the way (s)he talks wisely or even just shouting those unnecessary comment. haha !
I'm missing the way dira tells her-so-much-to-tell- stories in details. I mean, very detail so that we keep listening to her the silence :)
so where are the other girls ? huu payah ! :p

you know, the after feeling of mingling with ur peer-group or ur very close circle, is such a good thing. you're kinda fully recharged. or even sometimes you're an introverted person. you know that introverted-person tend to have some energies from themselves, by taking some times to be alone, but not feels lonely. they're kinda people are enjoying their loneliness than be among others. that'ss reverse from the extroverted-person, who take some energies by mingling/ hanging with others.

but somehow, what im saying is, though you're kinda introverted-person it doesnt mean that you're totally hate to go hang out with people or your circles. You might hanging out or mingling with them but there's still a side that you wont or you cant to share with others. thats me !
I somehow can be look like an extroverted person from the outside but im still who I am as an introverted person.but today I feel like take some energies from my besties like some extroverted-person do..
lets just call it a Quality time with my closest circle (re: besties). hmm, sounds cool :p

I think the subuh time has come. so it's time for me to pray and have a quality time with my bed :)

see youu..
feel free to leave some comments in here, unless you're lazy you may leave a checklist in these blank box
thank you..

nb : welcoming kiki a.k.a Ajeng's boyfie who has become "life report" follower. such an honour :D

Friday, January 1, 2010

my 2009 review. LOVE LOVE LOVE :)

2009 has been such a great and blessful year for me..
I've done things that needs to be done
I've started things that should be started..
but.. behind all of those things above.. I've been feeling guilty of something which i can't share here.

let me explain about 2009 towards me. i'll make it detail per month

Entering 2009. It's been my very first time having a boyfie in January, anyway its my Birthday month ! The previous years I had no boyfie in my birthday. though I've got Faz as my boyfie in my 21 years old, unfortunately he wasnt right beside me to celebrate it together. but its ok as long as the birthday present from him reached me ?? I ruined his plan of my birthday.. hihi!
At the end of december 2008, I was using his FB account and I found a message from his friend whom i know. He asked faz about what type / size he want (i forgot the details). The point is faz has erased the messages from his friend but as his friend sent a new message, the previous replied messages both of them shown! haha.. so that I knew his plan birthday present for me, and i couldnt keep pretending like nothings happen. As I asked him and recognized it then he was angry to me! haha I'm sorry sayang.. I didnt mean it. but I'm Kara who always notice and aware about something :p

In the early days of my bday, My friends surprisingly came home when I was having a call from Faz. wow I was so surprised there were Moi, Putri, Aya, Ajeng, Waza, Daniel, Dodi


bday cake from my parents

The day after my bday, my bestie Rommy came to my home.. she gaves me a shoes and.. some presents from my hunny bunny sweety bebiy faz. hehe ! turned out he planned my bday presents since December 2008. wow! and he asked his friend and Rommy to help him make it true.. but eng ing eng I ruined it! hihi. so here are the present..

a plenty of my pics
(thats why he kept asking me to send my pics to him back then)

a #16-orange-jacket (my birth date and 01.09 additional number)

a cute birthday card (was his very first time made a vector, not bad beb! )

was a month which I had been waiting since me & faz in a relationship. yes! he was coming to town!. and it was our very very very very first time face to face (kopi darat) after those webcam, chatting thingy.  we had never met yet before, but as we comitted to be karafaz (hehe) we couldnt hardly wait to meet each other. Oh I still remember how I felt when we meet at my home. grrr... nervous all over my body but i pretend to be cool even tend to be jutek. haha. poor him.. the point is he wasnt disappointing me. I mean physically. hihi.

it was the second day of our rendevous

just realized that he was petite at that time

sadly was a month that faz went back to Melbourne. but in the other hand. it was a month for me to get serious woringon my TKA (final assignment). I had a very solid team. they're my team, my peer-group, my aspirin, ahh! kinda miss them so muchh! Worked with various different characteristics of them. We are friend, we've got a brilliant idea of TKA topic, we've made it true, we've worked with some cool sources people (narasumber), we've worked with some credible additional crew. we've made our masterpiece girls!

Bembi, Aghi, Mondo

Joko anwar


April - May
Still working on TKA thingy. shooting and shooting.. were my busy time. so stressul moreever when we were entering the June. it was our TKA collection day. still hvent edited the video yet :(
but I feel like missing those moments with my balimo team

faz's bday on 10. While doing my TKA, I was making a birthday video to him. with his family members in it. glad to experience it. kinda sad knowing they're do love Faz but he's far far away from them.
wanna see it? just click
he watched the video while calling me. he laughed at first but as he watch his parents wishing all the best and telling how they're proud of Faz.. he was crying ! yes he was sobbing. he told me that he hasnt been felt like that before. :)
the deadline was coming. we're still kinda stress and there was a bit (or big?) problem about the TKA collection. we were late to collect the TKA. huahaha. my badd as a producer. me so stressed cause it was my responsible of the project. we collected the TKA the day after the deadline.hmm..

2th of july was our judgement day. not bad.. due to the late TKA collection we've got a minus point into A- with 85 point. huhu. unless the lateness we could got A with above 90 points perhaps. But I've been thankful about that :)
before sidang, look at my face!

after sidang

balimo taruih :)

oiya there was an extension UI selection. but I failed, so sad at that time. kinda shock and confused what's my next plan? but I've always known that Allah must have a better plan for us..
and as I knew there was an extension Unpad registrasion opened, my dad supported me. And I attended the test but as I did the test I'm kinda pesimistic, huhu.

But Allah had answered my pray back then. the 7th august I was so nervous, felt like it was my last hope to get in lecture again. wanna know how did I feel? click this
faz was kinda disagree that i would left jkt and started to live in Bandung. hehe but yeah i want to catch my dream and my dad's dream to have his child become a Bachelor ASAP. :)
I've been graduated on august 28 :) but sadly I dont took a picture with my friends. back home to early. my best regret in this year :(
anyway I did my make up by myself lohhh

a lil graduation syukuran. yellow rice made by my eyang :) love

and it was my very first time had a fasting month in Bandung. And I've been feeling happy to get Unpad and my class friends. oiya, i forgot to tell that at the first time in Unpad I choosen Journalistic as my submajor, but as the time goes by, me and dinda felt not comfy and dont like the subject so we converted to Mankom. alhamdulillah, luckily the subject are good enough and so the class mate. we are so solid, humorous, completing each others. lovely! glad to know them.

its me!

breaking fast together

LEBARAN DAY! alhamdulillahh..


by the way it also a month which faz went back jkt again ! yeay. twice in a year back to jkt due to me. haha pede ! this time kinda different from the previous rendevous coz I had to arrange my time between faz and my lecture in Bandung. different from March, that we alomost met each other everyday (unless two days), we werent always meet everyday. coz I had to stay in Bandung for a few days.

but there were some lovely days especially our engagement day on 11th and when we went to Bandung together and spent time together with his cousin and so his wife :)

with Deycil (faz's sister) in our our engagement day

with Achie and KeKen in Lantera, Dago Pakar :)

had so much fun with Faz in Bandung. we spent 3 days together there. ngangkot together, met up with my cousin Mbatya in timezone. unforgettable.

my (insyaA)soon to be husband behaviour :p

was a so-so month I guess. I had my first mid test in Unpad. had so much fun with mankom peole. Bandung + Mankom people has been such a everyday holiday! yeay.

our once a week activities . susu murni !

anyway 14th date was KARAFAZ 1st anniversary loh ! aw aw. alhamdulillah we've been togehter for so long. honestly this is my very first time got in a realtionship more than a year and alhamdulillah we've got a next level plan. hopefully came true ya Allah :)

nothing's special happened in this month. just like an oridnary month. filled with my college activities. oiya i think its been my longest week stayed in Bandung, though just two weeks stayed then back home. hihi.
anyway, just had a new years eve together with papa t.nina Mbatya and her mom (bude wawe) minus my bro whom went to Bogor. we went to puri, dinner, and had durian as our dessert at home:p

GOSH ! just realized that 2009 was a great great great year for me and so Faz I guess. alhamdulillah ya Allah. couldnt say and ask for more but Alhamdulillah

January is coming..
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